Looking after yourself when in a caring role

January 20, 2020

Supporting someone else is sometimes called caring. You are a carer if you provide (unpaid) support and care for someone who has an illness, disability, mental health problem or addiction. 
Being someone’s carer probably only describes part of your relationship with them. You may also be a parent, partner, sister, brother, child, friend or other family member. This relationship can be just as (or more) important to you. You may also have other caring roles as well, for example as a parent to other children.
Supporting others can be mentally and physically exhausting. The time you spend caring can really vary too – some people look after someone for just a short time and others find themselves caring for someone for the long term.

Caring and the benefits system

The benefits system only defines you as a carer if you meet the criteria for Carers Allowance (the main welfare benefit for carers in the UK).
But even if you don’t meet this criteria, you may still be considered a carer by your local authority (council), and have needs for additional support. 

What might I have to do if I am caring for or supporting someone else?

Caring can mean a range of things. Being patient and giving can feel like part of the normal give and take of any relationship, but sometimes you might find yourself spending a lot more time and effort helping someone else.

You may provide a range of support including:

  • giving emotional support
  • helping someone seek help for a mental health problem
  • helping someone cope with a mental health problem
    cooking and cleaning
  • personal care like washing and going to the toilet
  • budgeting and looking after finances
  • supporting them to live with others in your family (e.g. brothers and sisters)
  • helping other family members understand the needs of the person you are caring for
  • giving medicine or providing medical care
  • going to appointments and advocating on their behalf (helping them express their views and wishes)
  • checking they are safe.  

Sometimes people may not accept they need care or support from you. This can make things extra hard. Have a look at our info on what to do when they won’t get help or they push you away and say things that upset you.
“I was completely unaware that what I was doing was a carer role and the effect it was having on me. I didn’t think about reaching out for support myself.” Carer

My partner/family member has a mental health problem. Am I a carer?

If you look after someone with a mental health problem you might be unsure about whether what you do ‘counts’ as caring or whether it’s just part of day-to-day life. A lot of people associate caring with physical tasks but giving emotional support can also be a big part of caring. 

I’m a young person who supports someone else

Lots of young people care for someone else in their family. It can be a tiring and difficult job, especially when you have to fit it in around school or work.


Further information guides from Mind can be viewed at; https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/

Halton Carers Centre can offer advice and support to local Carers and Young Carers; 01928 580182